"I... I know what you're saying... but I think it'll take my heart to break before I can leave him. I've thought that too, but I've always hoped he'd stay true and I know that I guess I'm not much to offer but after all the times I've pushed him away and still taken me back I just kinda thought it would stick," she paused. "Or maybe I'm just clutching at false hope and living in my own little bubble just not seeing what everyone else can see but I just... can't leave him. I'm sorry," she said, looking down.

Jasmin sighed, " don't apalogize to me," she said with a shrug, " I'm just...I'm trying to help and I'm not doing a very good job of it."

"You are Jas, but... I think I just need to make my own mistakes," she said.

she nodded, ' I just hope he doesn't hurt you beyond repair Cera. sometimes leaving hurts but it hurts less than staying and waiting to get hurt."

"I know that, but leaving without cause can hurt more too. I'll servive if he leaves," she said, she knew she would servive it's just how long it would take before she felt remotely normal again if he did leave, that was the question.

"Will you?" she asked then shook her head, " you kow who you remind me of?"

"Who?"

"At the risk of sounding totally pathetic and drawing from pulp fiction you sound like Bella in New Moon. you are so attatched that...I don't know I just think...its not healthy."

That wasn't good. She could see Jas's reference and she knew how Bella's story eneded. The only way bella returned to reality was by Jacob, she didn't have her own Jacob who could bring her back. But even with Jacob she wansn't really herself, only Edward's return really healed her and she knew if Blane left her there would be no returning. She bit her lip, "Oh."

Jasmin tapped her fingers against her coffee cup, " yeah," she sighed, " maybe if you came with me it...it wouldn't be liek that Cera. if YOU were the one to draw the line and end things maybe...maybe it wouldn't hurt so much." she was really pushing this hard with no real evidance. she didn't want to see her friend hurt and she couldnt' imagine blane sticking around for long. he already cheated on her once

She could see the logic, her mind could see clearly the path she would take, but her heart betrayed her, it clung to him throwing the image of his face at her as she tried to think clearly. "I... I just don't think I can Jas," she admitted, she'd tried to let him go to much, it had nearly killed her.

Jasmin sighed, " itsd my fault you know."

"What?" she said, totally thrown off track by this.

Cam flicked her cigarette, watching to tiny stub fall to the ground. She glanced back at her cell phone, still nothing from Blane. A text from Jessa, asking if she was going to come down tonight, to which she replied with a negative and a slight apology.

Jasmin looked up from her coffee cup, "maybe if I had tried harder you wouldn't be wiith him right now Maybe if I had cut ot all the spa treatments...I just feel responsible. If I had tried to talk you out of it..."


BLane had a very short day today and he got off work before cera would have gotten home fro school. he knew that visiting Cam was probably a bad idea but he wated to so badly